One of the fun internet “news” stories that keeps coming up in the wake of Star Trek‘s new success is William “No, I’M Kirk!!” Shatner’s heartache at not having been cast in the reboot and his unbecoming (and overblown?) desire for insertion into future installments.
I love being Shat on as much as the next guy– his self-referential Priceline Negotiator ads are humorous enough and as a personality he’s a barrel of monkeys–, but as bad as he wants to be included in more space-hopping, green-alien-chick-sacking cosmic adventures, I think he’s the only one.
Dearest William, your relevance to the land of Star Trek is over. Your Kirk gave us some fond memories, but we don’t want your Kirk any more– and while you may be “delighted” at the opportunity to return for another trip on the Enterprise, no one else is. In fact, the mere thought of your inclusion in the new franchise just gave Trek‘s lusty, light-refracting sheen a coating of mildew, cobwebs and a yellowing package of adult underpants.
So let’s do everyone a favor and stop talking about all this “put me in Trek!’ nonsense post-haste, where you can enjoy the good life and we can enjoy your iconic status unabashed. Deal?