No, Seriously… SHUT UP.

Last night’s viewing of 9 was a pleasurable one from a theater-going perspective. Loud-mouthed jokers kept their traps shut, cell phones were kept silent and dark and the only loud whispering was when I told Andy to get his hand off my thigh.

Buuuut… as my “assault and battery with dirty words and glances” record can attest, that’s not always the case.  Especially when attending movies locally– and for a second there, I thought I might be overstating unfair aspersions, but then I thought for a few more seconds and can say with assurance that I’m not. Local theater rudery and hooliganism is overstocked here in our rural metropolis.

…which is why Westates needs to get their act together and follow the lead of AICN’s Butt-Numb-A-Thon Film Fest venue: The Alamo Drafthouse. See, The Alamo Drafhouse not only respects the movies they screen, they also respect the theater goers who pay to see them,  not only asking for movie decorum, but justifiably demanding it.

Alamo DH- shut it2


Alamo-shut it


Awesome and, incidentally, available for franchise. Please let me know if you have roughly $1.5 million to invest.

*Thanks to Sacred Cinema for the images.

6 comments On No, Seriously… SHUT UP.

  • If I had the cash, you’d be my man, little Danny Vinton. What I wouldn’t pay to put Westates and their crappy theatres under. I’m still waiting for a damned bench in their front entry for the aged and/or handicapped. I’d best get my booty up to Franklin and start playing powerball.

  • That is the best thing ive seen all day.

    I cant begin to tell you how many dooshasses ive had the pleasure of sitting next to(or them behind me using my back as an Everlast bag with their foot)while out at the movies.

    Honestly i can usually torrent movies most times before they hit theaters so why am i getting in my car, fighting traffic and crowds, paying the $20-40 bucks it costs for tickets and snacks just so i can sit next to a dillweed who refuses to put away his iphone?

    For instance when Jeannie and i went to Cloverfield there were two wal-mart shoppin ladies there who thought it was perfectly fine to bring(what looked like)their 5yr old and 8yr old girls.
    At one point one was crying outloud due the sound and violence on screen and the other was walking down the isle cause she was fascinated with the fat dude eating popcorn(me)and keep in mind this movie was LOUD, they had it dialed in.
    The two ladies were literally on their phones the entire movie.
    I was pissed, i went out and asked the courier if they would ask the retards to maybe take the kids out for a break.

    They never showed up.
    This was Jordan Commons.

  • I don’t do well with theaters either. I don’t like the idea of my head getting lice from the cushions, or my pants brushing up on someone’s balled up booger (you know they’re there), and usually the stupid picture is out of focus. These are all good reasons for me to stay home and do nothing instead. Plus I really like tv, and also wasting my money on something more girly.

  • Hand off your thigh…oh man that’s hilarious! Your lady friend is pretty lucky gal. Sexy and super funny in the same package!

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