Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark Trailer Makes Me Want to go Huddle in a Corner and Cry

I think the title said it all. This looks creepy. Maybe it’s because the little creatures look like messed up bats or maybe because they speak freaking I have no idea except for the fact that this,sir, is scary crap. I mean if you watch this and say it is not scary you have issues my friend.  Don’t be Afraid of the Dark is about a girl named Sally who goes to live with her dad, Alex, and his girlfriend, Kim.

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Gosling’s Drive Looks Absolutely Phenomenal

I never thought in a million years I’d be looking forward to September and the autumn line-up of movies more than I was looking forward to this summer’s slate of popcorn, blockbuster goodness. Thanks to a big fat dose of meh, fall will bring more than a change of color to the leaves, but will also bring Drive, a new “action drama” starring Ryan Gosling (Crazy, Stupid, Love.), Carey Mulligan (An Education), Bryan Cranston (Breaking Bad), Albert Brooks (Finding Nemo),

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Trailer for The Thing Promises Gore, Scares, and, Most Likely, Stupidity

Supposedly, The Thing, due in theaters on October 14, 2011, is not a remake of John Carpenter’s 1982 sci-fi horror movie of the same name, but rather a prequel. Odd, though, since the trailer basically feels and seems like the same…exact…movie. And that’s what producers Marc Abraham and Eric Newman want with The Thing. They want to remake the movie without slapping John Carpenter in the face, so what you see from director Matthijs van Heijningen Jr. is the same

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Soderbergh’s Contagion Puckers my Pruney

Bird flu. Swine flu. Pandemic. Chances are you’ve heard those words in the media over the last few years, and, if you’re like me, even though you scoffed somewhat at the chance of some violent outbreak, you’ll readily admit your buttcheeks were clinched at the prospect of the flu reaping havoc on life as we know it. Thanks to our Hollywood pal, Steven Soderbergh, the director behind such movies as Sex, Lies, and Videotape, Erin Brockovich, Traffic, Ocean’s Eleven (and

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Jurassic Park Trilogy Coming to Blu-ray in October! Woot!

How do you not get excited about this news? Well, I take that back, if you don’t have a nice HD television or a Blu-ray player than you could give a rat’s rear about such glorious news. The only bad thing? They have to include that crap-for-crap Jurassic Park III in the set. I mean, let’s be honest, Jurassic Park: The Lost World has enough eye-rolling moments that we really don’t need to be double-socked in the nuts by having

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Grab your Depends: Horrible Bosses Red Band Trailer Online

I wasn’t so sure about Horrible Bosses, but after this last red band trailer (the movie hits theaters next Friday, July 8), I have to say I think this might vie with Bridesmaids for the top comedy of the summer. We all know, aside from a few funny lines and scenes, that The Hangover: Part 2 was a pretty solid disappointment, so the question is can another buddy comedy, this one about three dudes trying to whack their bosses, fare well

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Breaking Dawn Teaser Trailer Reveals Bed-Breaking Freaky Time

It’s been a year since we’ve had to commune, by choice or force, with Edward (Robert Pattinson), Bella (Kristen Stewart), Jacob (Taylor Lautner) and the whole Forks, Washington crew, including the pasty-skinned, pissy Volturi creepies from Italy, whom we’ve seen briefly in the last two films. But hold on tight, Twihards, because The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 1 hits theaters on November 18, 2011 and the first preview hit the web earlier in the week.  You can watch

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Shark Night 3D Poster and Trailer, While Cool, Does Not Redeem Surefire Crapfest

Sharks are cool. 3D is lame. And both together, as last summer’s Piranha 3D proved, will not make good bedfellows. But Hollywood doesn’t care. Shark Night 3D has six pack Abercrombie abs, bikini wedgies, boobies, blood, explosions, hillbillies, wakeboarding, booze and CGI 3D sharks to make the under 25, backwards-hat-brigade of douchebags squeal like they’re warming up their $1 bills for a trip to Vegas. David R. Ellis, the director and man behind 2006’s Snakes on a Plane, isn’t looking

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